The power of voice and silence

"The human voice is the organ of the soul." -Henry Wadsworth  Longfellow

A voice can be a powerful thing. You can use it to bring comfort to a crying child, build up a friend, empower a community. You can use it to bring light to injustices and to put a smile on someone's face.

You can use it to make music.

But you can also use it to tear down others, to bring harm, to cause pain. You can use it to bully, to threaten and to degrade.

You can use it to bring fear to others.

How you choose to use your voice is entirely up to you. 

For those of us who believe in something bigger than ourselves, we can use our voices to bring praise to our Creator.

Obviously, there are different types of voice. There's a voice that comes from a place of strength, a necessity to speak up and speak out. If you physically lose your ability to say words, you can always find a way to express this voice. 

Even when it's hard and scary, it's important that you don't let this voice be silenced. Sometimes this voice needs to be still, but that's not the same as being silenced. 

Being still is a willingness to wait with anticipation. It doesn't mean simply being quiet. It means being open to what else is happening. It is sometimes in that still, small quiet that you hear what is most important. 

That's often when we hear the voice of God. It's not often that God comes in a loud way, but in a quiet way. A way that requires you to truly take a moment to just be. 

"Be still and know that I am God." -Psalm 46:10

We get uncomfortable in the silence sometimes. It's there in the silence, with nothing to distract us, where we have to face reality. Where we have to face ourselves. 

And, if we're truly listening, we have to face God. 

Silence can be deafening.

Which brings me back to the matter of voice.

At the start of December, I lost my actual voice. I spent a weekend using markerboards and notebook paper to communicate. It would have been easy to sit at home and not do anything, but life didn't stop simply because my voice had. 

For part of the weekend, I had to do things alone, as my husband had to work. That was scary and mildly embarrassing. Why was it embarrassing? I think because it made me feel different in a way I couldn't control. I don't mind being different, but I want it to be something I choose, not something that's forced upon me. It was frustrating. For a brief weekend, I began to understand what it could feel like to have a disability.  

[Just for a brief understanding, as I could never fully grasp that, not having dealt with that myself. Please don't misunderstand me here!]

For the most part, people were very understanding. 

However, it took some effort to be truly understood. Some people don't want to make that effort, I quickly learned. 

Why are we so unwilling to inconvenience ourselves just a little to meet someone where they are, so they can be understood?

Why do we not take that moment to be still and wait for clarity? To make an effort to listen instead of speak?

This is a lesson I go over with students in my public speaking and interpersonal communication classes, but I've found that most adults could benefit from it: It's not simply important to listen, but to truly hear. To listen for understanding. Only when you stop attempting to craft your answers but you truly listen without assumptions to what the other is saying can you understand.

That will make a difference in your communication and your relationships with others.

But, like anything worth trying, it takes effort. It requires being other-focused. And that can be hard. Like being willing to sit in silence, being willing to listen can be uncomfortable. 

Because you may find, like listening to God, listening to what others need to say can bring you face-to-face with things you may not want to hear.

However, that's how you grow.

Please enjoy this video of Bucket the dog using his voice!