Wedding planning begins, or I hope I don't turn into Bridezilla!

"I dreamed of a wedding of elaborate elegance,

A church filled with family and friends.
I asked him what kind of a wedding he wished for,
He said one that would make me his wife."
~Author Unknown

So Jim and I have been talking about marriage for some time now.

My Facebook announcement :)

When we first starting dating, I brought it up. Not because I'm desperate to be married — I was never one of those girls. I've always been the type that said I could take it or leave it, and I truly meant that.

No, I brought it up because IF I am in a relationship, it's the committed kind. I don't do casual, I don't do one night stands. I'm still a virgin. In fact, Jim is the only guy I've ever kissed.

Why? Well, there's a lot of reasons behind those decisions. First and foremost is my faith. I've always believed that sex before marriage is wrong. That said, that's a decision everyone has to make, a decision between them, God, and their partner.

I don't believe God said that it was wrong because He wants to condemn people or keep them from having fun. I believe He said it because it makes life unnecessarily complicated. It makes it difficult to choose between the right person and the fun person. And it makes you forever connected to that person, no matter if you want to be or not. Nevermind the possibilities of pregnancy and disease, but that's a different post by a different person.

To be honest, I never really dated before Jim. There a few guys that I "talked" to, and that taught me a few things, but those never produced anything. And those weren't even until I was in my 20s!

For me, the idea of even talking to a guy in a romantic/relationship way, beyond friendship, was just nonsense. It's not because I was scared of them, although I admit I was never good at talking to them. It's because I never saw a point in initiating something potentially serious and messing up my heart or mind over a person that I knew I wasn't ready to commit to. I know that's a heavy statement, but that's how I felt. Why waste my time when neither of us were in the position to make any commitments?

Besides, I had a lot going on when I was younger and I didn't have the time for that — further proof I wasn't ready. You don't HAVE to "make the time" for your significant other, you want to. 

Admittedly, I'm sure there will be times in our life together when we don't want to, but that's something you'd have to ask a married woman — not an engaged one. I know there have been times when we've frustrated each other beyond measure...but I digress.

Anyway, when we met, I wasn't looking for marriage, but I wasn't opposed to seriously dating. 

Jim's story is very different from mine.

When we met, he had recently found his faith. He was divorced, had been in a few other serious relationships, and had/has kids. (I love them to pieces, by the way.)

He was interested in dating, but not the idea of marriage. Who can blame him? Eventually, obviously, he began to change that opinion. I'm the marrying kind...and his unicorn. :)

Look at how much there is!
And that's just before January!

So here I sit, planning my wedding. The man I love proposed on Christmas Eve.

The more I talk about it, the more I realize how true the above quote is. I love him, he loves me. We both love God. Beyond that, not a lot matters.

We both want a wedding that matters. That reflects our love of God, each other and others. Not in a churchy, preach at you way, but in a way that helps others and gives back. Apparently, you can register at charities, for people to donate in your name instead of gifts — which seems a splendid idea. We don't need anything, that's certain.

I love the ring he got me — it's got a little triangle in the middle. I don't think he planned it that way, but it reminds me of something a minister said once, about how by moving closer to God, we move closer to our spouse. I loved that analogy then and continue to now — I think we might incorporate that into our ceremony somehow.

And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart. ~Ecclesiastes 4:12

It's going to be a very small ceremony. Mostly close family and a few friends. I want to remember who was there. Later, if my parents so choose, we might have a big, post-wedding bash to celebrate.

What I would love to find is a dress that matters, too. One made by some charitable organization to benefit others and one that I can maybe alter a bit and wear again. Or I can always donate it to someone else. I don't want to drop a ton of money on a pile of tulle. It's just not my style.

Who wouldn't want these
beauties in their wedding?

I'm also trying to find a way to incorporate my dogs :) Jim says it would be a bad idea with Bucket, since he's such a goof, but we will see ... at the very least, they will be in some of my pictures. :)

And my long planning list begins. Man, there's a lot to do for a wedding. Of course, I'm already breaking the rules — not fall colors in fall, for example.

Stay tuned, I'll try to share more about the mind of a bride as the planning begins...

Luna would make a great flower girl escort, right?
And Bucket would be a good usher :)
Or, you know, book greeters!